I was feeling down, sad, left out and alone on Thursday night, coz one of my friends didn't invite me to her birthday party, but she invited half of my friends there.
I know this may sound very trivial and why am I bothering about such a small thing?
My mom would tell me "to take things easy". As much as I want to, it's not happening coz me and that friend studied together, had meals together at the same table, talked about almost everything under the sun, she helped change my dressing, had "coffee breaks", went clubbing together sometimes, etc, and she didn't even invite me to her party! I felt so sad especially when my other friends who got invited asked me if I was going, and I didn't even know what to reply to them, so I just told them the truth, "that I was not invited." The whole room just went silent.

The party was on Friday. I didn't go. My MSN nick is joy.

Why?

Felt so sad, talked to stephanie on the phone for like 2 hours, i think, about how i felt. Thanks dear, for listening to me "cry", for just being there to listen. I didn't know who to call, just felt that I needed someone to hear me, or at least to be there, but everytime I picked up the phone, I really do not know who to call, because friends would be busy studying or slacking or doing their own stuff, who would be free to hear me out? There is no one to call in college, no one to call anywhere, the only one is God. Even then, you would not hear God talking back to you.

After the phone call, stephanie told me to go and pray, coz whatever that she said would not make me feel better, but God can!

So I prayed, in front of my laptop.

The most honest prayer I ever had so far. To tell God everything that was on my mind, everything, all my fears, my worries, my sadness, and forgiveness for feeling angry, sad and downright unhappy.

And I got that everlasting peace and joy, thank You, Jesus, went on to have a good 4 hours' rest, did crappily for BDA test, but managed to survive through spanish, tute and test.

Couldn't crash into the bed coz I couldn't get to sleep.

Then, when the time came for the people who got invited to go to the party.

I was at peace, though I did feel a bit sad, at the fact that my friend apparently didn't treat me as her friend, and she invited people who don't even talk to her to her party, and not me!

I was at peace.

So, when I am sad, what do I do? When I am happy, what do I do? What did I used to do?

Go play the piano. So i took all my piano books, went down to the piano room, just me, the piano and God. Played my heart out, played my emotions out, my feelings, my thoughts, my love for music, myself out to the Lord.

Even if the piano is in a soundproof room, the music could be heard. But at that moment, I made a decision was to sing what I was playing, all the worship songs, sing them out to the Lord, do not care about what other people will hear, that some girl is singing Christian songs in the piano room. To be not ashamed of God and His Word and to sing praises to His Name.

Did that, and it was one of the best one-to-one worship sessions ever!

Played the piano for like 2 hours, then went to visit ian at the front desk coz he was on duty.

Played Munchkin, just at when we were about to win, the fire alarm rang, what an eventful night!

But I felt blessed! I felt like even if I was not at the party, God was with me all along and gave me angels.

Ronnie and ian for playing munchkin with me and running out of the building in the freezing cold because of the stupid fire alarm.

For letting the fire alarm ring after i played the piano. I would be so freaked out if I was alone when the alarm rang.

After a party, people usually go clubbing, but 4 friends came back at like 10pm, just after the firemen left, to play pictionary, bluff and spoon.

Great night!

And from what I heard today, I am so thankful that I did not go to the party! That I was not invited! All things happened for a reason. God probably (no, definitely) knew what was going to happen there, and probably felt that it was not safe for me to go. Anyway, I cannot even drink, so there is not much of a point to go.

The birthday girl (or my friend) and her friend got so drunk throughout the night that they started playing with knives and were like trying to stab each other. Also, one of them actually cut the other person. There was a small cake fight, and basically havoc.

So, GOD IS GOOD ALL THE TIME! Though it may not seem like it at the beginning.

HALLELUJAH!!

AMEN!!