maybe i should start talking about my birthday celebrations which i've left out this year.

i had an MA assignment due on my birthday and a 2500 word essay due on the day after my birthday, and i actually fell sick, terribly sick on that week. My birthday happened to fall on the same day as St. Ann's founder's day, so i had delicious quiche & chips for lunch and angel hair pasta with wines for dinner. There was also a concert for celebration. but i couldn't eat the chips coz i was sick... sigh~

The night before, ian came to my room around 10pm, and said "i wish you Happy Birthday to you now, ah. i go and sleep now." i'm like okay... thanks.

Then, at midnight, ian came to my room again and wished me Happy Birthday proper with ronnie...

i didn't go to uni on my birthday coz i was doing my MA assignment and my essay. The degree of sickness was very serious. It's those kind of fever where you just feel like dying, coz your head's so painful and getting out of bed makes you feel like fainting. I even had to ask ronnie to help me go buy medicine. sigh~

Soon after, ian called and asked me if there was formal dinner that day, i said "yes" and he asked in a very "casual" manner if i was in my room, the moment he started talking on the phone, there was this weird silence around him on the line, so i thought mich & miin were with him, hehe, which they were. i said i was, and so he said okay. mich & miin came over.

with really nice yellow flowers and the chocolate mud cake!!

i'm tired now... very long la.. the birthday post.. update later.. sigh~

Another Quote.

"Just get rid of all those unwanted thoughts and let God do all the thinking."

-Stephanie Lee

A Quote.


"The first step to finding a God-written love story begins with handing the pen to my God."

-Koyuki.

i still want to kill the same particular person right now!
this person is the root of all my troubles!
idiot.

happy new year everyone!!!

i want to kill a particular person right now!!
whose name starts with the letter "M"!!
guess who?
no prizes for guessing right. =p

at the 八达岭，entry to the Great Wall of China

Thank you so much for helping me sort out my feelings and thoughts on this particular subject.

Have a merry belated Christmas or Chrismukkah and an early happy new year!!

luff,
amanda

i don't hate my mom anymore!!!
=)

i hate my mom.
what's the point of eating medicine when it won't cure the infection?!?!?!!!!
i've been eating that medicine, Clindamycin, for more than 3 years now, and the infection still comes back everytime!
i've went for 2 operations to clear the infection, and my most recent one, the surgeons actually drowned the whole area with Clindamycin, but guess what? the infection is still there, and the antibiotics does not help at all!!!
stupid mom!
i'm the one eating the medicine, if i have liver failure coz i ate too much, i'll be the one dying, not her!
and her reasoning for "forcing" the doc to give me medicine is that it'll prevent the infection from spreading!
HELLOOOO??? i haven't eaten the medicine for like almost a year already, and the infection hasn't spread yet, i'm not in a worser condition than before i did the other two operations, and the fluid collection, listen, not infection, fluid collection, is embedded in the muscles near the implant.
the prof said i don't need medication.
the doc said i don't need medication because it won't work, it won't cure the infection, because
1) it's in the muscle, the antibiotic can't reach the muscle.
2) you've been eating it for 3 years, it didn't help then, it won't help now.
3) if antibiotics work, the prof won't recommend surgery.
4) quoted from the doc himself, "i doubt the antibiotics will work at all".

but my mom, still "forced" the doc to give me medicine, useless medicine for me to eat, coz she thinks it will prevent the infection from spreading into the blood stream.
my counter is that it hasn't spread yet, and what if it does, the thing is the freaking antibiotic can't even get to the freaking muscle where the fluid collection or infection which my mom thinks, how does it prevent it from spreading or cure the infection or clear the fluid collection!!!?!??!?

i have the stupidest mom on earth, it's just my luck to have her as my mom, so therefore i have to eat the medicine coz it costs me S$18.50. and i would be wasting money, but my mom will be my mom, and she'll go like "i'm your mom, you have to listen to me!! i say eat, you eat!!!"

:sob:

what's the point?
do you see the point?
if there's a point?

i hate my mom.

Masa came and left and now i miss him.

歌：摩天轮
唱：Hebe


坐摩天轮 送你一程
慢慢升高 心慢慢冷
趁着机身 划过云层
愿你收到 我留的吻

离别气氛 往往会拉长泪痕
怕我郁闷 打起十二分精神
僵硬的唇 是逞强的后遗症
不想谁 看见你 泪在翻滚

心真的疼 目送着我爱的人
难舍难分 却隔一道玻璃门
转身飞奔 到常去的游乐城
在空中 才道别 能不能

坐摩天轮 送你一程
慢慢升高 心慢慢冷
从此每当 我对你的想念太难忍
坐摩天轮 心会平稳

看摩天轮 像不像时间齿轮
转了一圈 又到了什么月份
每张票根 压在枕头下加温
霓虹灯 温暖等 待的人

坐摩天轮 送你一程
慢慢升高 心慢慢冷
从此每当 我对你的想念太难忍
坐摩天轮 心会平稳

坐摩天轮 送你一程
慢慢升高 心慢慢冷
从此每当 我对你的想念太难忍
坐摩天轮 心会平稳
满天星辰 会陪我等

我爱你 sung by S.H.E.


从你眼睛看着自己 最幸福的倒影
握在手心的默契 是明天的指引
无论是远近什么世纪
在天堂拥抱或荒野流离

我爱你 我敢去 未知的任何命运
我爱你 我愿意 准你来跋扈地决定
世界边境

偶尔我真的不懂你 又有谁真懂自己
往往两个人多亲密 是透过伤害来证明
像焦虑不安 我就任性
怕泄漏你怕 所以你生气

我爱你 让我听 你的疲惫和恐惧
我爱你 我想亲 你倔强到极限的心

我撑起所有爱围成风雨的禁地
当狂风豪雨想让你喘口气
被划破的信心需要时间痊愈
梦想牵着怀疑未来看不清
就紧紧地拥抱去传递
能量和勇气 我爱你

我爱你 我想去 未知的任何命运
我爱你 让我听 你的疲惫和恐惧
我爱你 我想亲 你倔强到极限的心

哪里都一起去
一起仰望星星
一起走出森林
一起品尝回忆
一起误会妒忌
一起雨过天晴
一起更懂自己
一起找到意义

让我爱你
我不要没有你
我不能没有你
绝不能没有你

Dear God,
thank You for helping me pass my MA and my BF!!!
You are so good,God!!
I couldn't sleep last night in happiness!!
No more doing the stupid idiotic assignment!
No more staring at CAPM, dividend imputation, efficient markets, signalling theory, NPV, and very very difficult MCQs that are of at least 3 steps each, except the 40cents one!!!
YAY!!! thank You, thank You, thank Yoouuuuuuu!!!!!
thank You for being faithful when i am faithless!!!
i love Yoouuuuuu!!!
In Jesus' name,i pray,
Amen