ok. i know i haven't blogged in like ages.. so now i'm gonna update anyone who passes by here on my life lol. Something happened today that is worthy of a blog post on it, not that the stuff that happened from the F.u.j.i.t.s.u. time till now was not worthy of a blog post, but i was probably quite sick of blogging. Anyway, back to today's topic.
Well, i'm healed! Cured! of my back problem that has inflicted me since i was 11 in June 1996 to Jan 2007 when i'm 21. It took me ten years to learn what God wanted me to learn i think from the whole experience, and i hope i don't forget it.
You see, my back problem seemed scary when i first got the diagnosis at the age of 11, thinking of the need to go for a major back operation, meaning straightening my whole upper back sounds really tremendous and tedious, and of course it did, it took me like 3 months to recuperate, almost bedridden coz i was lying down or sleeping during those 3 months, missed the first quarter of my Primary 6 education, then went to school and did superbly horrendous for mid-years', everything was in the fifties.
Oh, i couldn't carry my own schoolbag, so my mom (i love my mom!) had to help me carry them up four levels, put them in the class, and came back down to drive to work or sth. One day, the principal felt that i was a spoilt brat coz my mom had to carry my school bag, so she scolded my mom for carrying it for me, and that same morning, my mom made me drink bird's nest soup and nothing else at like 6am in the morning, i know all of you will be like "wah, bird's nest soup for breakfast lucky girl!!" but um, i don't like to drink bird's nest soup, i think it's disgusting, drinking cooked bird's saliva. lol. And during assembly that day in the morning, i fainted in school, and the principal was like, omg! so that's the daughter of the mom carrying the schoolbag, so she's like okay, mommy can continue carrying schoolbag for daughter, and i went home early. such a gay Primary 6 first half year, no wonder my grades were bad. Then, that's where Tiffany came into the picture, coz she was such a dear!! she helped me carry my school bag everyday, she may be small, but she is super strong! and she never complained at all!! such a great friend!! =) Thanks Tiff!!
So, then, my mom was worried that after six years of education, there was a possibility that i will fail my PSLE (Primary School Leaving Examination), or that i couldn't get into a secondary school coz of my back problem, so um.. she made me go for tuition for English general, English Comprehension & Composition, Maths, Science and Chinese, in other words, every single subject i was studying. I like the ECC & Chinese tuitions best coz they didn't make me do assessment book after assessment book.. man!! Singapore tuition teachers are crazy, those who make you do assessment books, and buy like 9 of them.. oh and on top of that, i still had piano lessons...-> which helped me to destress a little, and the whole wearing back brace 24hours, and taking them off to shower, and wear again.
Then PSLE came and went, and i thank GOD coz i managed to pass and stay on in MG.
As for secondary school, some pple thought i was a freak, but that was the place where i made lifelong friends who accepted me for who i am, which is cool.. i had another operation in Dec 1999, to straighten the upper part of my lower back... i think after 10 years, i can you know.. recite my medical history offhand, tell you the dates, what drug i'm allergic to, what drug i took, who treated me.. etc. That operation, was just like oh okay, now my lower part is crooked, need to straighten.. that one was a much shorter operation and it took me 2 months to recuperate.
Somewhere in JC 1, i was given the all clear to take off my back brace, but you know, pple can't be bothered understanding that you've got a back problem, that's why you look like a freak, and that you're wearing a back brace.. etc.. coz the JC i went to concentrated on looks, money and properties, lol. branded goods... haha. anyway ya.
then in JC 2, something happened, this thing grew at my back, but it was like all suishy, and reddish, fear gripped me, went to see doc, docs were like um "what is that?" then went for operation to take it out, and realised there was a lot of fluid in there, but the funny thing is, there is no bacteria growth in the coutures they did in subsequent 2 other operations in Feb 2005 and Jan 2006.
Well, basically, i was very special to have this condition, because 1) the complication happened 3 years after my last operation, 2) this complication only affects 1 in a million or billion pple in America, so since it is quite rare in America, what's more in Singapore? 3) i was probably their first case, coz they all were taking xrays, and scans and getting different departments to look at it, and it was all very weird, and they were all clueless about it.
So then, my prayers to God were like um, what is it? can you help me tell the docs what it is so they can treat me properly, and just heal me please! kind of stuff.
But, the thing is, whenever i hear or feel that the problem is coming back, i'll start becoming very sad and depressed like the whole world's gonna end, and that God may never heal me, and complain and whine, and then when i get to the bottomless pit after a very long while, i realise that only God can help me now, so i climb right back out...
Okay, until now, they still don't know what's going on, but since it hasn't come back when i was off antibiotics, and that there are no redness, no infection, no bacteria growth on any coutures, they have declared, the infectious diseases doctor and the orthopeadic doctors, defeat to God, because God knows what's going on, and they don't know, but i'm well, and that's all that matters now!!
And the thing i wanted to thank God is that throughout these years, my grades have always somehow made it, i haven't repeated a year yet, hopefully i don't for next sem, heard it is a killer sem.
And the other thing is that, i think i can safely say, i hope, i grew stronger after all these years in my walk with God, lol. and i had my 6th operation in July 2006, to remove all the metal rods in my back, and whatever infected tissue in it.
Before my last operation, before i was pushed into the operation room on a wheelchair, i had a feeling that that was gonna be my last operation, and i hope it is, because the anastheist who attended to me was the same one who attended my very first operation in Dec 1996, at the age of 11, it was like a closure on a very big chapter in my life.
Did you know that when i finally realised what God was trying to tell me thanks to Steph's prayer the night before, it was through Pastor Brendan's message, that God was trying to tell me that whenever i'm met with a problem, the first thing i should do is to turn to God and ask Him for help, and not whine and complain about it, and turn to God as a last resort but as a first resort.!
And now, whenever i'm met with a problem, i try to turn to God, i make a conscious effort to turn to Him as my first resort! because He took 10 years to tell me that.
So, i'm healed and cured of my back problem!! YAY!!! THANK YOU GOD!! HALLELUJAH!!!
Well, i'm healed! Cured! of my back problem that has inflicted me since i was 11 in June 1996 to Jan 2007 when i'm 21. It took me ten years to learn what God wanted me to learn i think from the whole experience, and i hope i don't forget it.
You see, my back problem seemed scary when i first got the diagnosis at the age of 11, thinking of the need to go for a major back operation, meaning straightening my whole upper back sounds really tremendous and tedious, and of course it did, it took me like 3 months to recuperate, almost bedridden coz i was lying down or sleeping during those 3 months, missed the first quarter of my Primary 6 education, then went to school and did superbly horrendous for mid-years', everything was in the fifties.
Oh, i couldn't carry my own schoolbag, so my mom (i love my mom!) had to help me carry them up four levels, put them in the class, and came back down to drive to work or sth. One day, the principal felt that i was a spoilt brat coz my mom had to carry my school bag, so she scolded my mom for carrying it for me, and that same morning, my mom made me drink bird's nest soup and nothing else at like 6am in the morning, i know all of you will be like "wah, bird's nest soup for breakfast lucky girl!!" but um, i don't like to drink bird's nest soup, i think it's disgusting, drinking cooked bird's saliva. lol. And during assembly that day in the morning, i fainted in school, and the principal was like, omg! so that's the daughter of the mom carrying the schoolbag, so she's like okay, mommy can continue carrying schoolbag for daughter, and i went home early. such a gay Primary 6 first half year, no wonder my grades were bad. Then, that's where Tiffany came into the picture, coz she was such a dear!! she helped me carry my school bag everyday, she may be small, but she is super strong! and she never complained at all!! such a great friend!! =) Thanks Tiff!!
So, then, my mom was worried that after six years of education, there was a possibility that i will fail my PSLE (Primary School Leaving Examination), or that i couldn't get into a secondary school coz of my back problem, so um.. she made me go for tuition for English general, English Comprehension & Composition, Maths, Science and Chinese, in other words, every single subject i was studying. I like the ECC & Chinese tuitions best coz they didn't make me do assessment book after assessment book.. man!! Singapore tuition teachers are crazy, those who make you do assessment books, and buy like 9 of them.. oh and on top of that, i still had piano lessons...-> which helped me to destress a little, and the whole wearing back brace 24hours, and taking them off to shower, and wear again.
Then PSLE came and went, and i thank GOD coz i managed to pass and stay on in MG.
As for secondary school, some pple thought i was a freak, but that was the place where i made lifelong friends who accepted me for who i am, which is cool.. i had another operation in Dec 1999, to straighten the upper part of my lower back... i think after 10 years, i can you know.. recite my medical history offhand, tell you the dates, what drug i'm allergic to, what drug i took, who treated me.. etc. That operation, was just like oh okay, now my lower part is crooked, need to straighten.. that one was a much shorter operation and it took me 2 months to recuperate.
Somewhere in JC 1, i was given the all clear to take off my back brace, but you know, pple can't be bothered understanding that you've got a back problem, that's why you look like a freak, and that you're wearing a back brace.. etc.. coz the JC i went to concentrated on looks, money and properties, lol. branded goods... haha. anyway ya.
then in JC 2, something happened, this thing grew at my back, but it was like all suishy, and reddish, fear gripped me, went to see doc, docs were like um "what is that?" then went for operation to take it out, and realised there was a lot of fluid in there, but the funny thing is, there is no bacteria growth in the coutures they did in subsequent 2 other operations in Feb 2005 and Jan 2006.
Well, basically, i was very special to have this condition, because 1) the complication happened 3 years after my last operation, 2) this complication only affects 1 in a million or billion pple in America, so since it is quite rare in America, what's more in Singapore? 3) i was probably their first case, coz they all were taking xrays, and scans and getting different departments to look at it, and it was all very weird, and they were all clueless about it.
So then, my prayers to God were like um, what is it? can you help me tell the docs what it is so they can treat me properly, and just heal me please! kind of stuff.
But, the thing is, whenever i hear or feel that the problem is coming back, i'll start becoming very sad and depressed like the whole world's gonna end, and that God may never heal me, and complain and whine, and then when i get to the bottomless pit after a very long while, i realise that only God can help me now, so i climb right back out...
Okay, until now, they still don't know what's going on, but since it hasn't come back when i was off antibiotics, and that there are no redness, no infection, no bacteria growth on any coutures, they have declared, the infectious diseases doctor and the orthopeadic doctors, defeat to God, because God knows what's going on, and they don't know, but i'm well, and that's all that matters now!!
And the thing i wanted to thank God is that throughout these years, my grades have always somehow made it, i haven't repeated a year yet, hopefully i don't for next sem, heard it is a killer sem.
And the other thing is that, i think i can safely say, i hope, i grew stronger after all these years in my walk with God, lol. and i had my 6th operation in July 2006, to remove all the metal rods in my back, and whatever infected tissue in it.
Before my last operation, before i was pushed into the operation room on a wheelchair, i had a feeling that that was gonna be my last operation, and i hope it is, because the anastheist who attended to me was the same one who attended my very first operation in Dec 1996, at the age of 11, it was like a closure on a very big chapter in my life.
Did you know that when i finally realised what God was trying to tell me thanks to Steph's prayer the night before, it was through Pastor Brendan's message, that God was trying to tell me that whenever i'm met with a problem, the first thing i should do is to turn to God and ask Him for help, and not whine and complain about it, and turn to God as a last resort but as a first resort.!
And now, whenever i'm met with a problem, i try to turn to God, i make a conscious effort to turn to Him as my first resort! because He took 10 years to tell me that.
So, i'm healed and cured of my back problem!! YAY!!! THANK YOU GOD!! HALLELUJAH!!!
You are the God that healeth me
You are the God, my Healer
You sent Your Word, and healed my disease
You are the Lord,
my Healer
-Don Moen
